Tuesday, November 30, 2010
People can disapoint you. I was shocked to hear racist, bigoted comments from certain artists at the show this year. I just kind of thought artist had innate compassion and intuition. Well guess what Peggy, they don't. They are just people like me with flaws and prejudices. I grew up in a home where respect was expected. We were taught to see all races as valuable and to give highest regard to those who have been given the least respect. My dad was one of the few of his friends in the tumultuous riot ridden 60s, that would not tolerate racism. He would not stand for bigotry and he had the courage to speak out to his friends. I am cut to the core when I hear someone put down an entire race of people. I love football, but can not stomach the Washington racist team. Is there any wonder we have wars constantly, when people in our small community still hold racist ideas about Indian people. When within the walls of a simple art show, we have those who are way more interested in me then we. Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me. That is my prayer today and the only way to sooth my disapointed heart is to look to the one who is forever true and see the light that shines in the darkness. How about a little "Walk a mile in my moccasin before you judge me" ?
Saturday, November 20, 2010
I am reading a wonderful book right now and it is opening my eyes to realize how little I know. Because we all know so little it is best to keep our opinions out of the way of love. I for one am so so guilty of nursing my intellectual judgements. I am working my way toward being an elder and in some cultures I would be considered one, but to arrive there I must let go. Letting go is not easy because it means facing my absolute grip on control. I am a child of the 60s, the freedom and radical thinking generation. I want to stand up for justice and take down all the oppressors of culture and human dignity. Guess what, flower child, you can't. And can't is certainly not a part of my vocabulary. Didn't can't @#%$ his pants. Oh well letting go is saying I don't know and I can't. I am learning the best way to take down oppressors is to put myself down. Love is not self righteous. Love does not claim to be the guru. Love serves. Love forgives. Love lets go. Love leaves room for error. Love is ok with not understanding. Love is sacrifice. Love is knowing very little. Love is caring. Love is not self seeking. Love is a journey. Love is listening. Love is way more than I can begin to know so I pray that I can begin to know love.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
I was looking over some facebook pics a young friend sent to me of her and her handsome young beau and suddenly I was struck with powerful memories. I wanted to write her back and say hold tight to these moments, cherish them, guard them from adult doubt and skepticism. For a moment I remembered frolicking in the leaves and seeing the huge world and loving the possibilities. Before the death of my dear ones, the scars of divorce, the pain of knowlege and constant reminders of mortality. I remembered driving from San Diego to Michigan with two strangers from college, with carefree laughter and unmeasurable possibilities. I remember sledding down the cold snow covered hills without a chill in my bones. Sleeping until noon and staying up half the night because I couldn't leave the fun. Memories pour through my dissalutioned tears. Life is too short and life is too painful. That is the truth, but please if you are young or young at heart, just disregard those words. Soak up your moment...........live free and unguarded. Believe, hope and love as you skip thru your days. Don't let worry seep into your world for soon it will come crashing in like a hurricane. Now is your time and it will never return. So fall deeply in love, climb the highest mountain you want and stay up as many nights as you can for tomorrow comes quickly. You will stand next to the bed of the one you love as they slip away, a flight of stairs will be a breathless challenge and 10:00pm will be a late night for you. But life is sweet from start to finish if you will embrace the moments. Live and love to live!
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Being on the road in Mississippi with musician/teacher John Two-Hawks and artist Joseph Chamberlain is full of great conversation. We laugh and talk, we talk about philosophy and history. We often spend time just making fun of ourselves. You would think I would be thrilled on the road, surrounded by new places, faces and experiences. Believe me I am not complaining but just sharing truth. I just like being home. I love waking up to my morning friends..coffee..birds and a crossword puzzle. My comfort zone. I remember never wanting to go to school, kindergarten was like the monster under the bed. Father Bob used to tell me I needed to get out and stay out of my comfort zone. I guess he knew me pretty well. We don't change much in this life. We are connected to our beginning no matter how long we travel the path. Our ancestors, our teachers, our fears and our familiar spirits hang around. If we had positive role models, loving parents, encouraging teachers then we are blessed. But most folks don't have such luck. Most folks have their monsters in the closet or under the bed. I for one had my share of luck or blessings but still I have to shake off that "I don't want to go out into the big scary world" and tell myself " maybe there is an ice cream cone waiting out there somewhere."
I am truly thankful for the wonderful friends and family I have. I am so thankful for my connection to them, for the beautiful earth and for miles traveled.... but mostly I am thankful for a new morning with no where to go, a hot cup of coffee, some birds outside my window and a very easy crossword puzzle to work on.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Maybe it is the time change, or perhaps the constant longer and longer lists of things to do, but today I feel kind of flat. So, I will let my wonderful memory bring back some passion. This is it, "Creek Mary's Blood" A song of truth and of great power. A heart song and a song with a universal cry for justice. And along with the memory of the music, I see, Tuomas, committed and connected to his powerful gift. I see John Two-Hawks, bringing a message of power and peace to the world. So I call up all the passion my weary heart can house this morning and am thankful for the wonderful gift of music of memory and of friendship. How is it a man from Finland can capture the essence of 'The trail of tears', when here in America it is a fleeting distant minor history lesson? Passion, that is the answer. We have become a country consumed with Economics and Politics and have lost our passion for life. We have become a people more interested in tickling emotions than solid truth. We just want it all to feel good, look good and not interfere with our "plastic ceremonies". Passion is deep and it is grown in struggle and in uncomfortable living. So maybe I need to toss my list to the wind, throw my clock out the window and dance to some "Nightwish" truth music or meditate on some Two-Hawks soul music, either way I shall get out of my comfort zone... my western medicated "me" illusion and step into the unknown and unpredictable hard cold, but alive, truth. Passion, don't leave home without it!
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Thursday, November 4, 2010
There are certain things I love about life. Morning coffee and crisp fall air. I love to watch the piliated woodpeckers come to my window feeder, hang upside down and eat to there hearts content. And I love the beautiful sound of the Cedar flute. American Indian culture and Pendleton blankets rank highly in what I love about life. I am pretty much crazy about good writing and great music. An inspired piece of art will bring me to tears. There is nothing better than a good laugh that takes your breath away. I often wonder why as a society we concentrate on the negative, the hurtful and the sadness. There certainly is plenty of that to go around. But I will ask you the same question I asked the boys I work with this week. What makes you happy? Think about these things. Did you know that in your brain the grateful center and the fear center are in the same area. So if you are feeling grateful, you cannot be feeling fearful. So, how about a big does of Thanksgiving! Let your feast this year be more than turkey and dressing, let it be a feast of spirit and love. Make a list each day and if you have a loved one in that list let them know you are thankful to them..... oh and by the way, thank you for reading my blog, you are all incredibly beautiful people. Think I will add you to my list!!